Our one and only wedding picture……..I went to my brother’s house for the weekend to watch the Super Bowl, and I brought the video of our wedding hoping he could put it on a disc for me………When Jac and I got home from Vegas we looked at the tape, and she decided she didn’t like the way she looked so we never watched it again…..that was 18 years ago. I found the video in our box of important papers. I decided I wanted to see the tape again so I could hear her voice……..My brother not only made the disc, but he froze the frame and was able to make this picture. Andrea is to the right. He’s the one who picked the flowers and Jean Pierre is to the left…he cried though out the whole ceremony…..As you can see Jac chose her favorite outfit to wear…….an Ivory blazer and black trousers. We were all going to watch the video together this weekend, but I decided to wait……..I wanted to watch it by myself……..I still haven’t been able to put it on, but I will soon. I’ll gather my girls around and watch it this week end………………………………
Such a beautiful picture. When my best friend’s brother died, she scrambled to find every photo and video. I don’t know if you have a copy, but I just watched the interview you and Jac did with Lisa Robertson. Just google Louis Dellolio Lisa Robertson interview and it pops up.
It’s easy to see that you two are soulmates.
I have seen it, but thank you for telling me to just google it. It’s much easier to find.
Louis,
I wanted to share a special word I’ve learned in Portuguese that brings all your feelings together in one word “Saudade”. It was described to me to mean “the love that remains” after someone is gone.
When I researched further (I wanted to understand how to use the word properly) Wikipedia described it as the recollections of feelings, experiences, places/events that once brought excitement, pleasure, which now triggers the senses and makes one live again. It describes the deep nostalgic longing you are feeling at the loss of someone you care for.
But it goes deeper – implicit in the emotion is the fact it often carries the knowledge that the object of longing will never return. It can be described as an emptiness, like someone or something that should be there in a particular moment is missing, and you feels this absence.
It brings sad and happy feelings all at once; sadness from missing something loved and happiness for having experienced the love.
I can conjure this feeling. This kind of love is so potent and melancholy that it lingers. It’s a love that lunges forward in anticipation, but with nothing to meet it, it can only keep reaching out further. This brings a doubling of emotion. Plus a sense of lonesomeness out there in the ether, forever reaching for love.
“SAUDADE” at the loss of Jac.
Carol
Madeira Portugal
All my new Linea will be waiting for me when I return home in the spring.
Carol….there is so much meaning in one word. It’s all of what I am.
Dear Louis,
Such a lovely photo! I read all of your messages and your responses to us. You are such a kind and generous person to share your feelings and words of wisdom with us! Please know that I’ll be thinking of you when you and the girls watch your video.
Best,
Pam
Dear Louis,
In every picture you have posted of you & Jac the two of you are just beaming!! It’s so obvious how very much in love & connected you were to each other!!
My husband & I have been together close to 40 years.Aside from our son we have no other family.Just a few friends.We never used to think about it.Our love was all we needed.Recently, we’ve started to realize that there is no forever & fate will eventually separate us.It scares the heck out of us.All we can do is live each day to the fullest & keep making memories.Someday memories is all we’re going to have to get us through!!
Louis,You & Jac had 30 wonderful years of making memories!! The ones you’ve shared with us are awesome. You’ve had the wonderful gift of true love.Unfortunately, not everyone is that lucky. Hold on to your memories.If it helps please continue to share them.They will comfort you & help you heal !!
Alfred Lord Tennyson wrote”‘‘tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” . I truely believe it with all of my heart.Loving Jac made you the wonderful caring person you are today!!
Dear Evelyn….I can honestly say Jac taught me how to love….to truly love someone. She was and is my everything, that’s what makes her not being with me so very very hard. I can only say you and your husband should be partners in every thing. Do not do what we did. I worked and Jac took care of EVERYTHING else. To say I was lost when she was no longer here is an understatement which makes everyday living so much harder. You both should know everything about your finances, insurance….even the smallest mundane chores of cooking and doing the wash so neither one feels even more burdened and confused. It’s hard enough loosing the love of your life, but when you feel lost and have to handle things you know nothing about it becomes overwhelming. Jac was so worried that I wouldn’t know how to do anything she took care of, and she was right. Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning. Don’t let that happen to the two of you….I hope you both live a long and happy life. I always thought Jac and I would be like my parents…..living until we were 94 and would pass 21 days apart…..that wasn’t to be.
When you are a creative person and you work in a creative field, you are operating out of your right brain most of the time for years and years. And then suddenly you are forced to deal with insurance and social security and the IRS and so much more and all of that is all left brain activity which is so new and difficult. And you have to do it at the most sad and stressful time possible. And it’s hard and horrible I just want you to know I understand and feel for you.
Dear Ruth, I have never thought of it that way, but you are so right. I have spent my entire life operating from my right side of my brain. My oldest brother is the opposite of me. He definitely operates from the left side and always did. He understands math, mechanics, computers, gadgets etc. Everything that I don’t have a clue about. He has been a great help to me, and we are closer now then ever before.I regret that it took Jac’s passing for this to happen, but we had our lives and he had his with his family. I wish he lived closer…..I would see them much more.
You and your brother are gifted in different ways. It is a blessing that you can appreciate each other. And remember what Mr. Rogers said, “In times of trouble, look for the helpers.”
I am thinking that as you watch the video of your wedding day with your fur babies, they may very well recognize Jac’s voice and even her image on the screen. I once had a Clumber Spaniel who enjoyed watching TV. He liked action sports like basketball and his head would move back and forth as he followed the movement of the players. He would come to me and ask me to turn on the TV every day when it was time for Animal Planet which he loved. He would watch the screen intently and if an animal ran off the screen he would get up and look behind the screen. The TV screen was often covered with his slobber and had to be cleaned frequently. He was a great dog!
I hope they do recognize her, but I also hope it doesn’t confuse them, and make them think she’s coming back. It may be too sad for them. I’m not sure if I should let them see it??????
I don’t know but I was wondering that myself. They are much smarted and more sensitive than many people imagine.
I once had a St. Bernard I had to board for a month during a house remodeling. I started out visiting him frequently but the kennel owners asked me to stop coming because he got so upset each time I left. It broke my heart to do that to him and still hurts to think about. He was fine once I was able to bring him home but I never boarded him again.
Dear Louis, Beautiful photo. I love Jacs outfit, totally what I would wear. Typical of us women being so critical on ourselves when the people we love and have around us tell us how good we look. We had some tapes converted from when my husband was little (almost 50 years ago) and gave a set to my mother in law at Christmas. She watched them alone, by choice and found them emotional but also comforting to watch her late husband enjoying life. I hope you can watch knowing how lucky you were both to have each other and smile knowing Jac will be probably saying “turn it off” as I did when I saw footage of myself 20 years ago! Thank you again for sharing your stories. Love Janey
Your girls will understand and want to share it with you. Our fur children have tremendous depth of awareness and understanding.
Your posts mean so much to us. Please don’t stop.my husband and I , too had friends like Andrea and Jean Pierre. What fun we had together! Memories are so important now that they are gone. Thank you for sharing.
So wonderful that your brother could put the tape on disc and create this beautiful photo. You were a such a good looking couple. 💜
Love her favorite outfit, so classic and simply elegant. I am now stalking either blazer in my size. I wavered too long on which size I needed and which color…
Louis, Jac is lovely. It was good to hear you were at your brother’s, yesterday. I worried you were home alone. So wonderful your brother was able to convert the video to a CD and freeze frame a picture as well. It will be very difficult for you to watch the wedding video but you will know when the time is right. At some point, I hope you will find comfort in watching it and in seeing Jac, once again, on a day that she was extremely happy. Thank you for sharing your memories and allowing us into the special world of Jac and Louis. Prayers for you.
oxoxoxoxoxoxo
Cat
Louis, it is wonderful to see these pictures. My husband and I were also married 18 years ago this month. It was not the first for ether of us, and I thought a “wedding” was not necessary. So I suggested we go to the Little White Chapel in Vegas, have Elvis marry us, with the plastic flowers, something I thought would be so fun. My DH vetoed the idea. We may have passed in the night, however I get to enjoy the fantasy through you.
I am wearing the Rhubarb cowl WK sweater today. To me it is Jac’s sweater as it was the last one she modeled for us. I asked her what pants she was wearing, maybe you can remember. Was it the wine? Today I wore it with jeans and it looks good and feels great.
Love from WA
Dear Karen, I believe she was just wearing black pants.
Oh Louis, Jac is so beautiful. You look very happy to have such a lovely lady as your bride. And I just love your friends who are obviously thrilled for you!
Thank you for sharing the memories of your wedding.
What a wonderful photo Louis and I’m glad you have the video to watch. Thank you for sharing that special day with us.
Hi Louis
Such a wonderful photo of you and Jac. All of us who purchased the Ivory jacket appreciate it even more.
Absolutely stunning….I’m so glad you found the tape and were able to restore it. Beautiful memories! It’s unbelievable that you just presented the jacket on Tuesday and now we get to see how lovely it looked on Jac. I’m so happy I was able to get the replica of this Ivory jacket. Enjoy the video Louis. You made a beautiful couple. ❤️ Hugs Nancy
Lovely photo, handsome couple. Love seeing your photos and sharing your memories.
Thank you Louis!
Elaine